One Degree to Victory
Welcome to One Degree to Victory, the podcast where we help navigate life's toughest challenges while building the emotional security and freedom to live their best year yet. Each episode provides practical tools, heartfelt stories, and expert insights to guide you through day-to-day experiences and chart a path toward new possibilities.
Whether you're overcoming trauma, pursuing self-care, or redefining your future, this show will empower you to turn adversity into adventure for both yourself and your family.
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One Degree to Victory
Do Not Disturb Signs for The Soul: Why Self-Care Looks Like Being Unavailable
In this episode, I open up about the difference between silence and peace — and why learning to go into “silent mode” became essential to my healing after trauma. Sometimes self-care doesn’t look like spa days or journaling. Sometimes it looks like saying Do Not Disturb, withdrawing from noise, and choosing to be “unavailable” so you can protect your mental health, rebuild your spirit, and reclaim your peace.
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I pray that the roots of setbacks, storms, satanic attacks, and even self-sabotage erode, crumble, and wither away, to be replaced by the incorruptible strength, peace, and joy that only heaven can give that will neither change nor fade.
You're listening to One Degree to Victory, the space where stories, strategies and soul connect Together. We take one small step each week toward the life you know you're called to live. I'm your hostess, nalita Hollis, and today's story and conversation just might change your life. I want to talk about the difference between silence and peace. Silence is the absence of noise. Peace is a state of being and, in the wake of my trauma, I had to become silent to experience inner peace. Now, constant listeners.
Speaker 1:Sometimes we become silent because we don't want to get involved in other folks' business. Sometimes we are silent because we don't want to get involved in other folks' business. Sometimes we are silent because we have taken on the role of the silent observer, the watcher watching life unfold without active participation. Sometimes we are silent because we are ashamed, we fear judgment or rejection. Sometimes we are silent because we struggle to articulate the complex emotions swirling within us. We cannot find the precise words that will somehow miraculously lighten the immense weight and pressure of life's burdens. Sometimes silence protects us. In legal and business settings, staying quiet helps to maintain privacy, gives advantages and keeps negotiations on track. Professionals know that once words are spoken, you cannot take them back. Sit with me for a moment at the door of these complex emotions swirling within us.
Speaker 1:I have a habit of withdrawing during complexity. After the season of loss, I withdrew from friends and family for a little over a year. That's extended family y'all. I didn't cut my kids off and my mama off, okay, but I have a habit of doing that. Once, when I was dating, my partner was frustrated and really pissed off is more like it because I wasn't calling and responding like he thought I should. And in hindsight I probably should have expressed more often than not that I needed some space to figure things out. But, as is so often the case, sometimes even that doesn't land well.
Speaker 1:Side note sister girl, lean in, pay attention. Sometimes, when you voice your needs, your request for the time you need to clear your head, cleanse your soul and replenish your spirit, gets misinterpreted as rejection, coldness, callousness for their feelings or selfishness. Now, okay, I'm gonna admit it may be a little selfish, but when your emotional well-being is threatened, when you can't get through the day without your thoughts shutting you down, a little bit of selfishness is okay, and that's how it was with me. I needed silence. The paradox is there's so much noise around creating protected focus sessions. It's fine when you're chasing likes, views and dollar signs, right. They tell you to close the door and go, become a hermit and lock yourself away and stay in these focus sessions for X amount of time and X amount of days. All that's fine. But when it comes to your emotional well-being, well, that's being selfish. My God, we've got our priorities confused. Lean in constant listener. I am not going to shout, holler or scream all the way to the moon. I'm simply going to say push your button, go into silent mode and set the DND, do not disturb timer. Silent mode kept me functioning. Dnd kept me safe and kept me from falling apart. Beautiful soul with your precious, glorious self, you owe yourself your healing and so you must create the space for that.
Speaker 1:Back to those complex, swirling emotions. I wasn't angry during my trauma. I was disappointed, hurt, frustrated, afraid. That's probably the emotion that I experienced the most the fear. There were probably more, but I know I wasn't angry and that's the complexity for me. You know, we hear stories about people being angry at God when life goes topsy-turvy. I expected that emotion and I was confused, the longer the trauma drew out, as to why I wasn't angry at Him. Where was the anger. Hmm, that's a complexity of emotions if there ever was one right.
Speaker 1:But I think I shared at one point that I am not one to blame and so I couldn't be angry at God, because it wasn't God's fault that I was in this situation. Whether it was a test, whether it was a trial or a tribulation or not, I was not angry at God. My time was spent trying to figure out how the heck to get my family back on track. Now I didn't want to be angry at God and I realized that that thought that I had to be angry at God, that I was supposed to be angry at God, was an attempt to get me to deny him, to deny his sovereignty, to deny all the miracles I've witnessed, to deny that I'd not heard his voice on the shower floor when he told me to get up. I'd have to deny that he hadn't sent his messenger to remind me that I am seen, I am heard and that he has my family in his hands while I travel up and down these highways. I'd have to deny the many answered prayers known only to him, spoken in darkness against a tear-stained bedside.
Speaker 1:Sister girl, push your button and go into silent mode, set the D&D timer and find peace. Set the D&D timer and find peace. Peace cannot be found in noise and restlessness. To find true peace, to balance the complexity of life with how you authentically show up, means to find God. Let's go back to the beginning.
Speaker 1:Silence is all those things and silence is also survival. Silence is the journey toward peace. Peace is the arrival of freedom. To be free is not to be held hostage by anxiety, attacks, suicidal ideations or fear and any other overwhelming emotion that stops you from throwing open your front door and walking out to meet the world on your own terms. Constant listener, beautiful soul, sister girl, push your button, go into silent mode, set the D&D timer and be free. I love y'all. One degree to victory is about progression, not perfection, and that involves choosing a life that works for you now, in this season, and building from there. And, sister girl, it's going to take more than loving yourself. It's going to take vision for where you're going, hope to believe it's possible, action to make it real and love for your family to fuel every step. Action to make it real and love for your family to fuel every step. Take one degree forward this week and I'll see you in the next episode.